IOC

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IOC Help
The most useful thing you can do is be prepared. Right now you should be reviewing one act per week of Macbeth, making sure it stays fresh and that you can locate any scene in the play. The other thing you should do is practice - do take advantage of the offer to record a commentary on 5.1 for me to listen to and give feedback on. Some additional tips and resources are below. //**Thanks to Mrs Weber**//, who examines this part of the IB, for her comments, which I have added in italics.

1. The twenty minute preparation period
Using your planning time effectively is the key to a successful commentary


 * Scan the text and put it in context
 * Remind yourself of its literal meaning/ overview
 * Analyze it line by line for interesting language features
 * PLAN your commentary
 * WRITE your opening line

2. Structuring your commentary
Try one of the three suggested ways of organizing your commentary:

For a poem, locate it within the author's body of work, and the genre of World War One poetry as a whole. Later you will want to make more contextual connections (for example, look for patterns of imagery or other motifs, themes which are developed here and their relation to the rest of the play, for poems comparisons with other works in terms of language and authorial intent etc)
 * Always** start by placing the passage or poem in context: name the act/scene if you can, and say what happens before and after on stage.

a. Go through the extract/ poem **line by line**, explaining what each line means and how it contributes to the text. Identify language techniques and their effects, and try to answer the guiding questions as you go. Also try to make more contextual links as you go. End with some concluding comments about the whole passage. ADVANTAGES: This technique is thorough and means you won't miss anything important. It is also easy to organize. DISADVANTAGES: Unsophisticated in terms of organization; no sense of purpose without a thesis; this takes a LONG time. //Students who follow a line-by-line approach to commentary often do not finish their analysis of the whole passage. If you choose to follow this format, you must time it well in order to complete the commentary.//
 * Then** try one of the following:

b. Generate a thesis and 3 - 5 supporting points. Present your commentary like an argument, connecting various analytical ideas in support of your thesis. Bring your ideas to a clear conclusion. ADVANTAGES: This technique is sophisticated and will gain high points in the organization category if you get it right. DISADVANTAGES: You may miss important points that a linear commentary would pick up. If your thesis is weak all your marks will suffer. //Ms. Kemsley is correct. Students who discuss the relationships between the central features of the poem gain high points for doing so. Additionally, some students are able to more effectively discuss and evaluate the writer’s purpose using this approach. However, it should be noted that this is a rather sophisticated approach … practice, practice, practice and remember to use your 20 minute preparation time to organize your thoughts. You still have to cover the whole passage, after all!//

c. Following an introduction as outlined above, structure your commentary around the two guiding questions, fully answering each one with support from the text. Elaborate ideas that come to you as you progress through. In your conclusion, try to round of with connections to the rest of the play/ other poems. //This may also effectively be done throughout the body of the commentary as long as you remember to stay focused on the extract. //

Phrases to add structure:

 * Introduce your thesis with 'in my opinion'.
 * Using the first person to explain what you intend to do is acceptable
 * I would like to begin by.....
 * I will begin by analyzing lines 1 - 20/ the diction of the passage
 * Now, I would like to explore lines 25 - 40/ Lady Macbeth's characterisation
 * Next, I plan to interpret lines 10 - 20/ the imagery of the passage
 * Finally, I would like to examine the effectiveness of Shakespeare's characterisation techniques
 * In conclusion, my personal response to the passage is.....
 * Use the words: address/ analyze/ explore/ interpret to give a sense of purpose and confidence to your commentary

Phrases to help you address key points:
> // · The writer conveys an overall sense of … (TONE/MOOD) … // > // · Ultimately, the passage intends to DEVELOP CHARACTER/CONVEY THEME/CREATE TONE by… //
 * The **purpose** of the passage/scene/poem is.....
 * Before this passage/ scene...
 * After this passage/ scene....
 * The passage/poem is **structured**....
 * The **effect** of this image/ word choice/ sound effect is.....
 * · // The dominant impression of this scene/passage … //

3. What is a critical personal response?
This question about the rubric came up during the first higher level practice commentaries. To get 10 points on the 'Interpretation and Personal Response' criterion you must show 'critical thinking' and 'originality'. Here are some ways to do that (best placed in your conclusion):
 * Evaluate the success of the text - what is its purpose? (Dramatic impact, creating suspense, communicating a political message, evoking horror or pity from the reader?) More importantly, to what extent do you think it achieves this purpose, and why?
 * Evaluate the success of a particular language feature - do you find the diction descriptive? The rhyme melodious? The meter moving? The imagery evocative? Say so, and why.
 * If there is anything about the text you think is NOT successful you could articulate that here, but remember to support your ideas and be sensitive to the overall quality of the works chosen for your study.
 * Explain HOW characterisation is achieved; don't just say it's good or bad
 * Explain HOW tone is created through diction, imagery, and sound/pace combined, and its EFFECT on the reader/audience

Does anyone have any other suggestions or tips? Please post below!

**COT - acronym for your how to structure your intro**

 * C = Context. Put the passage in context with what happens before and after on stage**
 * O = Overview. Give a brief overview of the passage: The passage is structured....../ The purpose of the passage is....../ In this passage.....(explain what happens)**
 * T = Thesis. You don't have to give signposts but you do have to give an argument. Even something apparently simple such as 'In this passage Lady Macbeth's character is introduced and developed, but we also learn a great deal about Macbeth and her relationship with him' gives your commentary a sense of purpose, if you refer back to it throughout.**


 * Try these sentences to structure your introduction:**


 * This extract is from 1.5 of the play Macbeth. It follows** Lady Macbeth's receipt of a letter informing her of the witches' predictions and Macbeth's promotion to Thane of Cawdor. **It precedes** Duncan's arrival at the castle. **The purpose of this extract is to** introduce the character of Lady Macbeth to the audience, as well as to develop our understanding of her ambition and controlling nature. **The passage is structured** with two short soliloquies broken up by a section of fast paced dialogue when the messenger enters to bring news of Duncan's imminent arrival. **During the passage** Lady Macbeth first addresses her absent husband, wondering if he has the balls to kills Duncan (I just put that in to see if anyone actually reads what I post!). **Then** she calls on the spirits of darkness to remove her femininity and feelings of guilt and remorse, in order that she can achieve her ambitions. **In my opinion...**.(place thesis here).

// Two of the things that distinguish the “good” from the “great”: // // a) GREAT: The student demonstrates that he/she has felt a personal connection to/appreciation for the passage. This can be conveyed in simple personal observations … “The audience // feels // Macbeth’s fear in this scene …” or “I believe that the language suggests Macbeth’s ambivalence here …” Some students say that this can be achieved by putting yourself in the place of the character and/or writer and/or speaker when you deliver your commentary. // // b) GREAT: The student appreciates the overarching purpose of the passage and is able to show how the literary devices work in CONCERT to achieve the effect. //

Resources
Thanks to Brenda for the following useful document written by another teacher. It has some good advice! If you find anything else useful, please share it here:

Please find below Mr. Malone's guide to success in the IOC: __ Wrangling With The IB Formal Oral Commentary __

__ The Formal Oral Commentary __


 * What a commentary is:**

· a close examination of a poem or passage in which the student makes **salient** comments on the **craftsmanship** of the writer. This craftsmanship is demonstrated **in the work** that the student examines. · a discussion of literary effects achieved in the passage and **how** they are achieved. (In other words, use the passage to prove that the author used specific techniques to create an artistic effect). · a culminating activity reflecting a student's understanding of the authors purpose in a given work.

· NOT an unveiling of "what the author **really** means." · NOT a paraphrase or a summary of the work (although a summary might be included in your commentary). · NOT an introduction to the work.
 * What a commentary IS NOT:**

1. Relax. 2. Read the poem or passage slowly and carefully. 3. Read it again and jot down your first, gut-level response to the text. Don't analyse it or question it; just get it down. 4. Read it again and underline any words or phrases that strike you for any reason. Maybe they seem important, create an image, indicate symbols, or foreshadow events. 5. Read it again and look for patterns, repetitions, or connections among the things you underlined. Make notes that indicate what you see. 6. Write down (on scrap paper) what the passage evokes in you. Include examples. Use this to determine a possible theme of the text. 7. Write down (on scrap paper) how the text or parts of the text develop the theme, or how they advance the theme. DO NOT GIVE A PLOT SUMMARY. 8. Write down (on scrap paper) how the author's style or technique advances the theme. 9. Review all your notes, underlined words, and writings; and organise the information. Discard what you don't need or can't use. Get the raw information into an organised form. 10. If the commentary is written, go ahead and start writing. If it is oral, make a brief outline of what you will say. **Remember: Do not read your oral commentary straight from your notes!** 11. Arrange your commentary in a way that feels natural to you and makes sense. 12. Use specific quotes from the passage where you can. 13. In orals, speak calmly--don't rush. Don't try to sound sophisticated; just be yourself. Don't worry about the tape recorder--it's there to evaluate the teacher, not you.
 * How To Prepare Literary Commentary**


 * __ Things That Should Go In Your Commentary __**

Make sure you do as much of the following as you can in your commentary: · briefly summarise the passage as a whole (Do **NOT** paraphrase the entire poem line-by-line); · if it's a passage from Shakespeare, set it in the context of the rest of the play; · identify and discuss key words, lines, images, symbols, motifs, word choice, repetitions, sounds, and structure; · talk or write about characters, theme, events, narrative voice, tone, the author's style, use of time, atmosphere, irony, humor, contrasts, etc.; · explain what poetic devices are used (if any); · answer the guiding questions.

1. **Focus.** Don't begin a commentary without having a clear idea where you are going and what you are going to say. As Stephen Covey, author of //The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People// says, "Begin with the End in mind." It is critical that you learn to zero in on one or two critical focal points. Determine which are the key ideas and build your commentary around them. If you repeat some of the themes or main ideas throughout your commentary, you will help it to hang together much more coherently. 2. **Organize.** In order to sound coherent, you have to sound organized. In order to sound organized, there must be a loose hierarchy or order of ideas in your commentary. Your focal points and key words will help you sound prepared and organized, rather than careless and haphazard. 3. **Engage.** Come to grips with the passage. To do this, you must do several careful readings of the passage--preferably with colored pens or pencils. In other words, **engage** the material in a serious, thoughtful manner. To do this, you must engage the material on both intellectual and emotional levels. Engage means to give yourself over to, to involve yourself, to enter into conflict, to take part, to be **active**, to entangle, to be voluntarily committed and personally involved. 4. **Emote.** Inject some emotion, opinion, something of yourself and your beliefs into your commentary. In other words, don't be boring. 5. **Play.** Have fun with the language! Play with the passage! Tear it apart! Put it back together! 6. **Assert.** Be mildly aggressive and assertive. This is your chance to show off what you know. Don't be cocky and arrogant, be DO be confident, energetic, and stylish. 7. **Communicate.** Use an appropriate register. Don't use colloquialisms, slang expressions, etc. On the other hand, don't use “a 25-cent word when a 10-cent word will do”. You may be using that big, impressive-sounding word incorrectly, or you may be sounding like a pompous ass. 8. **Cohere.** Comment on literary devices and techniques, but not at the expense of meaning and coherence. 9. **Build.** Build outward from the passage in concentric circles. One thing IB examiners want to know is how **you make meaning** out of the text. But do this **only at the end** after you've dealt with the passage in a thorough manner--relating the importance of the passage to the work as a whole. 10. **Think.** Discuss the passage in a manner that makes you come off as thoughtful and intelligent. But don't be afraid to be original, independent, and creative.
 * Ten Key Tips**

__ Parting Shots __

"The student must discuss **how** the author creates the effect." "An effective commentary will probably discuss the artist/author's strengths and weaknesses." "The student should be able to discuss not only what a character does, but also how the author elicits our response." ** The ability to do this is what separates the puppies from the kitties. **  "The student must be able to discuss the underlying or universal values." "The student must personalize their response to the passage. They have to respond to it and enter into it in an engaged manner." "We do **not** want set patterns or prepared responses. We want a fresh, lively, clear, involved, sprightly, engaged response. We are looking for 'signs of life.'" "The student must talk about not only 'what' is said, but 'how' it is said." "The student must be precise in his or her use of language and must be able to make careful distinctions."

Adapted from: **//Stone’s Guide to the formal IB Commentary//** []

(Ragna) Something I found very useful during my mock IOC was writing out my topic sentence for every paragraph. I had tried to form a solid thesis with various literary elements I would focus on, I then continued to write down a topic sentence for each of those elements. I found this very useful during my IOC mock because even if I would deviate from the extract, or aspect of the piece, I could always look at my notes, and begin a new aspect/"paragraph", by reading out my full sentence. Through this, you recollect your thoughts, gain more confidence and are able to focus your next "paragraph" more. Additionally it helps when you start to feel you are steering off topic, you can always refer back to your topic sentence.